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Male And Female Definitions

Wants and needs

Female-The delicate balance of emotional, physical and psychological longing one seeks to have fulfilled in a relationship
Male-Food, sex, and beer

Communication
Female-The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one’s partner
Male-Jotting a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the guys

Butt
Female-The body part that all clothing manufactures makes “looks bigger”
Male-The organ of mooning and farting

Commitment
Female-A desire to get married and raise a family
Male-Not trying to pick up other women while out with one’s girlfriend

Entertainment
Female-A good movie, concert, play or book
Male-Anything with one ball, two fields, or three stooges

Flatulence
Female-An embarrassing byproduct of digestion
Male-An endless source of entertainment, self-expression & male bonding

Glass Ceiling
Female-The invisible barrier that stops women from rising to the top in business
Male-What would really be great since that hot babe works in the office above!

Lesbian
Female-A woman who makes love to other women
Male-A woman who has sex with other women so men can get turned on

Making love
Female-The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve
Male-What men have to call “boinking” to get women to “boink”

Remote control
Female-A device for changing from one TV channel to another
Male-A device for scanning through all 99 channel every 2 minutes

Taste
Female-Something you do to whatever you’re cooking, to make sure it’s good
Male-Something you do to food you think has gone bad, prior to tossing it out

Thingy
Female-Any part under a car’s hood
Male-The strap fastener on a woman’s bra

Vulnerable
Female-Fully opening up one’s self emotionally to another
Male-Playing ball without a cup

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Comments

( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
(Anonymous)
Nov. 7th, 2007 02:54 pm (UTC)
You're "bitchy"? Yikes. *hides*

Male-Food, sex, and beer. And not necessarily in that order, either.

Male-A woman who has sex with other women so men can get turned on. That's just perfect. :) Especially in the light of a recent conversation in which a man told me that "I don't care what you say, all women are bi." Um, yeah. Sure. Hope you're enjoying your own little reality over there, guy.

~ evalyn
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )